Thou Shalt Not Commit Sobriety

Im in 2 minds about life at the moment. Generally, as a lot of people will confirm, im a happy person but recently im troubled.

Wont bore you with the details but basically I have a problem which is occupying my mind quite a lot right now and there is no easy solution. Because I study science I tend to think about things very logically and everything has an answer, its either right or wrong and more often than not, you can google the answer ;) cant be doing with all this interpreting stuff you do in English and philosophy etc which is why its quite frustrating for me not to know what to do.

me and stacey macey

On a brighter note, im really excited for September! Theres just so many good things going on :D firstly, all my friends will be moving in. All summer its just been me and Stacey which has been really fun but we are in a 7 person house and its way too big for 2… plus I think I must be driving her crazy by now ;) all the girls I live with are some of my best friends and iv really missed them over summer, come homeeeeeeee

on my 18th

Another good thing is its my birthday :D and I always like my birthday! Except for my 18^th… that was the worst birthday iv ever had and its meant to be the best! It was unfortunately the same time there was that swine flu outbreak and it just so happened I got struck down! Was so so bad, I couldn’t leave my bed or eat anything or drink anything close to what I intended to :( on my actual birthday day I forced myself up and my dad took me to this really cute restaurant in churchtown called botanic bistro and maylis bought me into my first live poker game at blackpool G so wasn’t all bad :) but anyway apart from being terrified about turning 20, I think this year will be fun! Im having a luau party at my house in leeds and lots of my favourite people are attending from all around the country, im so excited to see everyone!

More good news, its student loan day coming up! Speaks for itself really…

Probably the best thing in September is freshers week… it’s the most funfilled week of the year without a doubt. I don’t think non students understand just how good it is. Being a student has its downsides… very poor all the frikin time… have to go to lectures (I tend to sack off the early ones but still have to go to some)… have to brave the dissection room hungover… millions of essays and lab reports to do… but nobody cares coz its still awesome!

This is just a couple of points iv selected from what we call ‘The Student Bible’...

• Thou must treat Fresher’s week as thy holy week.

• Thou must Purchase Asda's own kentucky Brand Whiskey and own brand cola to remind you that you once drank Jack Daniels and Coke.

• Thou must never throw an empty pot noodle away - for it is, from then on, a cup.

• Thou shalt practice the art of minesweeping when funds are low, and continue when funds are not low as practice for low fund times.

• Thou shalt ask "do you do student discount" before every single purchase, even if its Primark and thou already knows the answer.

• Thou shalt always choose thines favourite bar based on the price of Jagerbombs and not on the quality of the establishment.

• Monster and/or pro plus is thy holy sacrament.

• Thou shalt faithfully worship 'The Overdraft’.

• Thou shalt not commit sobriety.

• Thou shall shout "bogey" when in lecture and that bogey will be received by a louder "bogey", to which you will deploy a louder "bogey" this will continue until one or more boogers are expelled from the lecture hall at which point remaining boogers will chant "bogey, bogey" in protest for fellow boogers to be re-instated to their seats.

• Thou shall wear a hat in lectures when still drunk, because hats disguise all.
  
  

• Thou shall never under any circumstances attend lectures before 11am or after 12 noon.

• Thou shalt claim that thy mother and father "ruined my life" yet shalt rely on them for money, as thou has no job and is "too good" for thy dole.

• Thou shall flirt shamelessly for a double vodka red bull.

Amen.